Discussion in 'THE TEMPLE' started by Garner, Aug 25, 2005.
do not do this on the boards.
lol what warrented this thread Garner?
Just felt like giving us all a pre-empative warning?
It's really quite simple. Ba will set fire to anyone who starts flirting. Seriously. He'll go out, find them, and set fire to them.
So the reason Garner's saying this, the real reason, is that he doesn't want Ba to have fun. Selfish bastard, he is.
Aw, come on. Kenny and Ben are in love. They can't help it.
[quote:6b76eddce7="chrisjordan"]Aw, come on. Kenny and Ben are in love. They can't help it.[/quote:6b76eddce7]
Damn you CJ and your sexually driven teenage mind. Now put your sock back on your foot and get your hand from down your pants, good boy.
[quote:b67b194276="Ba"]It's really quite simple. Ba will set fire to anyone who starts flirting. Seriously. He'll go out, find them, and set fire to them.
So the reason Garner's saying this, the real reason, is that he doesn't want Ba to have fun. Selfish bastard, he is.[/quote:b67b194276]
Errmmmm... Doesnt Ba always talk in 3rd person?
"He'll go out, find them, and set fire to them."
a mistake... methinks.
Don't Smite me!
Erm, Mooseman, that [i:48e62d2e8d]is[/i:48e62d2e8d] third person...
I think Garner's post was serious. If you are repeatedly making posts that are directly addressed to one other member (especially if you are doing so in quick succession, flooding the board, and especially if you are speaking in a flirtatious manner), please take it to PMs or a messenger service.
[quote:950f331d96="Mooseman"][quote:950f331d96="Ba"]It's really quite simple. Ba will set fire to anyone who starts flirting. Seriously. He'll go out, find them, and set fire to them.
So the reason Garner's saying this, the real reason, is that he doesn't want Ba to have fun. Selfish bastard, he is.[/quote:950f331d96]
Errmmmm... Doesnt Ba always talk in 3rd person?
"He'll go out, find them, and set fire to them."
a mistake... methinks.
Don't Smite me![/quote:950f331d96]
Er... Mooseman - that [i:950f331d96]is[/i:950f331d96] third person!
Flirting is annoying, immature behaviour when it takes place in a public setting. The general consensus among the older memers is that we don't like it and don't want it on our boards.
[quote:6f13a8d915="Marcia"]Flirting is annoying, immature behaviour when it takes place in a public setting. The general consensus among the older memers is that we don't like it and don't want it on our boards.[/quote:6f13a8d915]
Seriously though, this is a very valid point.
Buzzfloyd, flirting doesn't have to be directed at just one member. "I'm so hot and I want sex all the time", or words that can be interpreted as such, without being aimed at a particular member, qualifies as flirting.
Oh yeah. 3rd person it is.
Damn my teenage hasteness! :x
I thought it meant always saying your name, and not I or HE.
But... I might be wrong. Just this once, mind!
If Garner is serious, and there could be a no-flirting rule, shouldn't this thread be in The Temple?
I agree with Garner, it was getting a wee bit annoying and would have benefited from being taken off the board.
Yeah, it can get annoying when it's on the board. That's what clacks are for!
[quote:91a10a0d62="Marcia"]Buzzfloyd, flirting doesn't have to be directed at just one member. "I'm so hot and I want sex all the time", or words that can be interpreted as such, without being aimed at a particular member, qualifies as flirting.[/quote:91a10a0d62]
Very true. And I do think this is something that should be added to the FAQ, if it's not already in there.
"I" is first person singular
"You" is second person singular
"He/She/It" is third person singular
"We" is first person plural
"You" is second person plural"
"They" is third person plural.
as for this being in the temple, this is NOT a new rule. in case people have forgotten the trekkie invasion, we have had a 'do not flirt' policy for a long time now.
There were complaints of flirting becoming rampant on the boards. I have reminded people that we do not flirt.
Since this thread's gotten quite a few views already, if no one objects, we can move it to the temple or to the dungeon dimensions friday evening?
And what flirting?
Pfft, I thought this thread was going to be about flirting in the real world.
First, i was confused becuase I thought Garner would be past teh flirting stage with Grace by now.
Then, I thought of how i could regale you of my flirting exploxts, like I flirtingly said the girl I fancied looked like a whore. Or how I explained (drunkely) how, while she might not be the best looking girl in the office she did have the best personality!*
Then, I'd wonder why i;m sinlge.
Then, I;d cry myself to sleep in my lonely, cold, empty, bed
.....well, bob might join me.
*....actually, I didn't fancy this girl and shes got a boyfriend... and i can't really remember the conversation I don;t think I started it, but i did say things along those lines. But to be fair, she *does* have the best personality and she *does* have braces. Charming I ain't, but honest I am.
Flirting...flirting, flirting... Nope I never did learn how to do that properly, I think I'm in the Rinso style of flirtation... No charm but a bloody big mouth for spouting off absurdities and unintentional rudeness. But at least Rinso has Bob to keep him warm at night and I've been with my boyfriend for years so we've gotten over the hurdle of the inability to flirt.
Flirting on board: never even crossed my mind... I'd personally find it hard to bring myself to ask the question: 'so do you wanna root?' in a public forum but thats just me. The rule is duely noted and I will refrain from inappropriate propositions, especially of Rinso
Damn, I was counting on that.
I don't flirt very well. One girl, I used to write cutsy heart filled flower ridden notes that on the'he inside said 'YOUR A BIG SPAZ!'. Now, I find this hilarious. But some girls :doubt:
Ermmm... still hasnt answered my question.... oh well
Then, I'd cry myself to sleep in my lonely, cold, empty, bed
.....well, bob might join me.
And thanks Rinso, now i will have nightmares!! Thank you o so much
Jesus man, Don't sully it with your dirty mind.
Bob can't be gay becuase gay=happy.
Could he be queer though?
Btw, yay im a man!
Only if he existed in the early 90's when people still used that phrase.
I still use it! I was born in the 90s!
so many things are queer..
Is Bob included?
One person's idea of a friendly chat = another person's idea of flirting = yet another person's idea of sexual harassment
I've always found that weird!
[quote:5b21e18e9f="colonesque10"][quote:5b21e18e9f="chrisjordan"]Aw, come on. Kenny and Ben are in love. They can't help it.[/quote:5b21e18e9f]
Damn you CJ and your sexually driven teenage mind. Now put your sock back on your foot and get your hand from down your pants, good boy. [/quote:5b21e18e9f]
So...this is allowed but flirting is not? I'm not going to flirt with anyone and even if I was going to, I'm not going to do it on a public forum. (someone else said this. Go them)
But, if your going to say no flirting, I think its only fair to rule out sexually explicit language too.
But, if your going to say no flirting, I think its only fair to rule out sexually explicit language too.[/quote:8cdacda844]
Awwwww!!!!! Pleeeeeeze let's not bowdlerize the Board!
But, if your going to say no flirting, I think its only fair to rule out sexually explicit language too.[/quote:47641da0fe]
Awwwww!!!!! Pleeeeeeze let's not bowdlerize the Board![/quote:47641da0fe]
C'mon don't make me stop saying penis and testicles... its definitely not flirting but if I said Kenny has testicles and he uses them I'm being sexually explicit but not particularly flirtatious. Although you could accuse me of stating the bloody obvious though
I think it should be your not trying to pick up on the board and you don't use inappropriate language either.
I hadn't realised there was enough flirting in the board to make people complain, but then again my online time is rather limited of late [i:9dec69398f]and[/i:9dec69398f] I am notoriously thick at detecting flirting.
Seriously kids. Get a chat room.
I still haven't figured out who this thread is for. Maybe I should go read some more ..
"Hey baby, can you, er, buy me a drink?
[quote:4f5420e685="sampanna"]I still haven't figured out who this thread is for. Maybe I should go read some more ..[/quote:4f5420e685]
Neither have I exactly. I want fingers pointed and perhaps broken.
Edit to add:
[quote:4f5420e685="Kat_in_the_Hat"]But, if your going to say no flirting, I think its only fair to rule out sexually explicit language too.[/quote:4f5420e685]
No, I reserve my right to be offensive if I please to be. More over I find the censorship offensive in itself, moreso than the language.
Flirting in writing on a public message board like this is just plain silly, childish and nauseating – it’s not the worst of crimes by a long way, but it is pointless and possibly a little alienating to some. Flirting is for dating sites and chatrooms, like the one in my signature, (join now, it’s free! And flirting is one of the things mentioned on the front page as allowable) and private messages.
There is no connection between sexual language, such as Kenny suggestion that someone put their hand down their pants and Spiky saying she wants to be able to say testicles, and flirting – the two are entirely different.
I am also unaware as to who has been flirting by the way, though I don’t need it pointing out – it’s just an obvious thing to not want on a site like this.
It seems only Garner knows whodunnit.
Maybe he imagined it all?
Maybe Mooseman and Fudgecake don't want to be singled out?
Maybe I was just reminding people of a fucking rule that we have in place and that others were in danger of breaking, possibly unwittingly?
Okay folks, this is going to get moved to the temple in a bit as it appears that we need to hit ourselves over the head a bit more, but:
We are a community of intelligent people who are required to behave in a (mostly) adult fashion. It is permissible for people who demonstrate maturity to behave in a silly manner. It is not permissible for people who behave immaturely to use that as justification.
There is a difference between "silly" and "immature" just as there is a difference between saying "Doors shags sheep" and "I loved blackadder because of the cod pieces", and I do not have the time or energy to explain to the hard of thinking why the speaker and the audience are relative to the tone, and vice versa.
Now, to avoid a repeat of the last time I tried to politely and discretely remind the great unwashed masses of what we do not consider polite, I'll be blunt and direct - Pepster style:
I've received a number of complaints that Mooseman and Fudgecake's 'flirting' was running rampant on the boards, and even in situations where it was relatively confined, it was still annoying to enough people for them to feel the need to mention it to me. Thus, I felt the need to make a thread about flirting IN GENERAL, and you know what?
Quite a few more people said "Thank god you did that, Mooseman and Fudgecake were getting on my nerves."
So, Mooseman, the people this thread was addressed to would be the community as a whole. The people this thread was *about* would be YOU. That what you wanted to hear?
If there are no objections, this thread will be moved to the temple by Sunday evening, British Standard Time.
No objections to it being moved, but I'm glad it started on boardania, because I bet some people wouldn't have read it if it is was in the temple, which probably includes the protagonists.
Which goes to show that people should read the temple, or they'll end up having rules they don't know about and possibly don't agree with, because they said nothing.
well, once we put some spit and polish on the Guidelines, we'll make sure everyone knows to go have a look at them.
After that, if anyone breaks a rule and feels the need to say "Oops, was that me? huh? huh? Was it? Was that thread about rule breaking really about ME?" we can just go ahead and slap a warning on them instead of saying "Yes, congratulations, you have attention seeking issues."
I'm fine with people having a joke. Even if it's a flirty joke, as long as it *is* a joke and it's clearly a joke. It when it starts to feel real that it become crap and anoying. Often these cross overs are hard to see, so people should be aware to keep (if you *are* only joking) the humourous harmlessness clear, if your not only joking (or incapable of making flirt comments jokey and accessable to the entire board) take it to a personal level.
That's a good point, Rinso. the crossover is indeed hard to see.
Take the temple_maiden example from our old site. When told in no uncertain terms that we didn't "ravish" on our boards and didn't condone any overtly flirtatious behavior, her response was very coquetteish. I honestly think these days that she just flirts and seeks attention as automatically as a fish moves through water. To her, she didn't see a problem with it in the first place, and thus that 'crossover' line was utterly invisible.
Attention seeking behavior should never be encouraged or cottoned to, but at the same time, it's not inherently bad if it's kept in moderation. I think, because different people have different levels of social awareness, that the only irrefutable 'crossover' point is when people start to complain.
And it's worth pointing out the different responses that we've seen to this sort of thing. Rinso cut out the pee jokes almost completely once he found out some people were getting tired of them. Temple maiden, on the other hand, has twice sent trolls to plauge us. learn, folks. learn.
Maybe I'm missing something, but isn't the whole thing more about monopolizing a thread with a kind of tet-a-tet chatter that excludes everyone else? I mean, almost everyone here has been guilty of posting a coy reply from time to time - nothing wrong with that - but when it's only two people bantering at each other over and over and over again - and no one else can get a word in edgewise - then becomes a "get a room!" situation.
I probably misspelled tet-a-tet...
To be blunt its both.
Honestly, I think there are times when the use of a thread as a conversation is fine. if it's on topic and relevant, then there's (theoreticaly) no problem if it's just between two people.
if the topic itself is something moronic, that can be a different story, though
I think it's fine if the topic is between two people, if it's something that might be of interest to other people. For example, if two people are having a conversation about creationism vs. evolution, and the posts consist of just those two people talking back and forth, it doesn't mean that other people aren't interested, they may just not feel they have anything to add to the debate at the moment.
On the other hand, when two people are flirting with each other, nobody cares except those two people.
What Mowgli described is what was actually happening, although it is not the only kind of flirting that is a problem.
Also, regarding conversations that are back and forth between only two people, there is an element of time/speed involved. In, for example, the question thread, if you answer the moment the other has posted, you are preventing anyone else joining in. However, if your answers had a significant amount of time between them (what constitutes significant varies from thread to thread), that would be different, because other people would have been given a chance to respond.
okay, so we need to include something about this in the community rules.
how about "Attention seeking behavior that flies in the face of the established culture is not just a bad idea, it's bad manners. If people complain you're flirting or hyping your own issues excessively on the boards, you might be politely asked to stop. Please feel free to take that as a strict order instead of a request."
okay, so the phrasing needs some work.
Separate names with a comma.