"Work is a dull thing; you cannot get away from that. The only agreeable existence is one of idleness, and that is not, unfortunately, always compatible with continuing to exist at all."
- Rose Macaulay

"If I wanted to read Wuthering Heights, I'd shoot my self."

For every minute you spend angry, you lose sixty seconds of happiness.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

That's printed at the top of my corporate notepad, and strangely enough, I actually like it.

Damn Spider pig

Emerson's a good guy. I find that the older I get, the more I come around to his way of thinking. Thoreau, for all his genius, is really a young man's thinker. I still value his insights, but I find that his lack of maturity becomes more apparent over time.

"If I wanted to read Wuthering Heights, I'd shoot my self."

When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. If it throws tomatos at you, make Bloody Marys.

Source - unknown.

hehe, i haven't heard that one before. i like it.

"If I wanted to read Wuthering Heights, I'd shoot my self."

I like the bloody mary one Improves my mood from a crap day yesterday...

One the back of the toilet door yesterday:

Live life deep, not long.

It was a strngely philosophical bit of graffiti that stuck in my head.

PhD Student: Research information sheet

There once was a man named Bruce
Who liked to sit on a spruce
He ate lots of chowder
And yelled at me louder:
"I'm talking to YOU, Mrs. Hughes!"
--> The Literary Genius: Mowgli

My literal way of thinking would have made me assume they were talking about my upcoming poo, not to worry about making it long but making sure it goes deep.

Dragon's Kingdom - Stop typing "alot" when you mean "a lot"! - Disappointed

That was my thinking, too.

Then I started to consider the ramifications, and quickly aborted out of that train of thought.

"If I wanted to read Wuthering Heights, I'd shoot my self."

If only I had the luxury.

Dragon's Kingdom - Stop typing "alot" when you mean "a lot"! - Disappointed

You've both got toilet humour brains. I'd recommend help but I think its too late.

PhD Student: Research information sheet

There once was a man named Bruce
Who liked to sit on a spruce
He ate lots of chowder
And yelled at me louder:
"I'm talking to YOU, Mrs. Hughes!"
--> The Literary Genius: Mowgli

If there were no people with toilet humour brains there would be no-one to write weird stuff on toilet walls/doors and the world would be such a boring place.

Damn Spider pig

One of the very worst things about working at the plant is that there is no graffiti allowed, and there really is hardly any anywhere, maybe that is why i like the dumpsters with the safety slogans on them, they may be a little Big Brotherish, but at least they are something not concrete gray , yellow, or stainless steel.

() ()
( ' ,') "don't eat green potatoes"
(> >) Last words of Mrs. Bertha Sperling
@( )_ )_

I thought this could be a good thread because I'm always noticing, hearing or reading things that stand out and stick in my mind.

This is especially true since a new colleague arrived in my team. If Chuck Norris and Van Damme had a son, and that son was then raised by bears in the forests of Canada that fed exclusively on magic mushrooms and those funny plants that make you laugh, he would be that guy.

Today's quote (a short one considering this monologue went on for the best part of half an hour):

"Hey, isn't it great that all those medieval things are still so useful? I mean if we all had grappling hooks we wouldn't need lifts, we could just walk up the side of buildings! (...) And Catapults, I mean, sure we have guns, bombs, bazookas. But if you want to throw a cow at your enemies, you can't do that with a bazooka, can you!"

Damn Spider pig

Nice one....erm. They haven't invented time travel yet have they? -because that guy puts me in mind of cavepeople from waaay back.

My quote of the day (easy because i'm currently giving English speaking tests)

Me: 'Is this a house?' (pointing to picture of something to be revealed in the next line...)
Various students: 'No. I'm an umbrella.'

Yes dearie...yes you are...I love them though. I just despair at teaching them anything other than the rote set material....but that's a rant for another day.

Bring on the quotes people!

-=Happiness is a journey, not a destination=-
Gypsy Travels | Gypsy Photos | Gypsy Space

This was said by a quasi-feminist colleague during a conversation at work, where a 19 year old male colleague (who's still quite naive in many ways) was espousing some 'old-fashioned' opinions on women:

"You're so traditional. That is so sweet, but also offensive."

(Playing blind Pictionary, me drawing)
Ella: Is it a giraffe?
Me (stops drawing): No
Ella: Star Trek?
Me: Yes!