Welcome to the TTPUMB, DWMF.

I can see me being barred for phone speak here

My guess for your introduction includes a British pop band of the late 60's who for some strange reason had Eric Clapton playing a ukulele!

Spoiler: Bonzo Dog Doo Dah Band

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, just like grandpa. Not screaming and panicking like his passengers.
Don't drink and drive from The Lancre Tavern